I’m reasonably certain that most people reading this site are already down with the outdoor lifestyle. I don’t really think that this site is the second stop on the daily blog catchup for people whose first landing page is the Robb Report. I’m pretty much preaching to the choir, here. Still, on the off chance that there’s anyone out there who doesn’t understand why outdoor women are rad, I’ve assembled a brief list of considerations for those considering pursuing one of us for dating and/or relationship purposes.
The Positives
1. Low level-of-difficulty undergarments.
This one just has to be number one on the list. The technical underclothes favored by outdoors athletes are blessedly free of snaps, hooks, extra straps, and complex configurations. Some might refer to them as “practical” and there’s nothing wrong with that, particularly when they’re just in the way.
2. Hard body (probably).
Is anyone’s body perfect? No (yes). But you’ve got a higher likelihood of hot-bodiness if you hang with people who actually use theirs for stuff on a regular basis. Someone told me that you could judge the season in Ouray solely based on the body types of people in the hot springs, and after seeing the ORV crowd last year, I don’t think this is an exaggeration.
3. Love of (or at least appreciation for) beer.
No blue drinks here! Well, not “none,” that’s too limiting. But we all understand that “summit beer” is a lot more low-maintenance than “summit Sidecar.” Most outdoor women are tough enough to open our own twist-off and aren’t so stressed about our fingernails that we won’t open a can, either. Pro tip, though, guys, it’s gallant even in the most dirtbag circles to open your date’s beer for her before you pass it over. That’s the outdoor equivalent of door-holding and such.
4. Dirt tolerance.
Speaking of dirt, we’re okay with it.
5. Practical footwear.
I don’t know how city guys do it. How do they tolerate mincing along at 5-inch-stiletto pace? Outdoor-minded women are only hampered by their footwear when they prefer their rock shoes too tight for walking (or, in the case of one of my partners, even standing. Ouch). When it’s time to move with purpose, go with the women who can stride out.
Downsides
I suppose I should mention some of them, at least in the interest of full disclosure. I don’t want anyone to get any unpleasant surprises, or think that this is all a one-sided deal. There are pros and cons just like everything else (but the underwear thing, that can’t be beat, can it?), so here are a few:
1. We’re going to do stuff without you.
Outdoorsy women are not the joined-at-the-hip type. If you wake up late, delicately moaning that you’re tired and want to sleep in and don’t feel like going outside that day, you’re going to get left behind. We won’t be back on time for dinner and the worst thing? We won’t even miss you. We’re too busy having fun doing what we love.
2. Chances are you’ll get schooled at something.
So we like to do outdoors stuff, and a lot of us are pretty good at what we do. If you’re not in possession of the New Renaissance Man’s Trifecta (absolute mastery of skiing, climbing, and mountain biking), you’ll have to be okay with your girlfriend being better than you at something. Which, frankly, if you’re not okay with, you’re lame anyway. Go get some confidence and don’t come back until you do.
3. Dirt.
Ah, there’s the mud! You know, some people believe that Shakespeare was a woman. If this were true, she’d have to have had a serious backbone to take on the theater establishment in those days (even female roles were played by men; it was a total boys’ club), so I doubt she’d have Lady MacBeth fretting over a little stained skin. We may never know. In any case, if you go out with an outdoorsy woman, you, too, will have to cope with a little dirt. Our hands and feet will not be model-perfect, we sweat and stink after a trip, and we get dirt under our fingernails like everyone else. If you think women should always be sweet-smelling, plastic-looking models of pristine perfection, do us all a favor and look elsewhere for your dates. We’ll tolerate your dirt, but you have to overlook ours as well.
4. We can’t be impressed by the usual stuff.
I can’t be the only one who has had the experience of a man trying to impress me with things I don’t care about. We don’t typically give a crap what someone does for a living, their familial lineage, the car they drive or their collection of their preferred high end vodka. Yes, to be worthy of consideration you do have to be supporting yourself and be reasonably stable, but the superficial stuff is just not important to outdoorsy women. Be genuine, capable, warm-hearted, and fun, and that will go a lot farther than showing off your blinged out Escalade or fancy slopeside condo (though that last thing…uh…might be useful, I admit).
5. Male friends.
I have concluded that there’s just no way around it. My dates are going to have to be okay with the fact that most of my adventure partners are dudes. I, like other outdoors women who put their adventures at the top of their lists every day, can’t really tolerate a lot of baseless drama and jealousy. The sad fact is that guys can go out and play more than women, and women who spend time in the outdoors end up with male partners for a lot of their activities. If this freaks you out, don’t bother with outdoors-oriented women. It will drive you mental and chase her away faster than you can say “ice screw”.
So there you have it. The choice is yours. Just don’t say I didn’t warn you.
This is an interesting post and I think you sold me on the first point. Blokes can go one further with the ‘commando style’ of none at all. There’s a risk though as I’ve torn my pants on hikes before, so there’s always the fear of ‘hanging hiking whilst on the tackle track’.
Hard body can be cool I guess? Not too hard, otherwise I might as well date my best mate. There shouldn’t be a total elimination of curves?!
Not impressed by the usual stuff? I know what you mean, but I’m always disappointed that there’s very few people left who are prepared to play nude combat chess. Trying to perform a Benko Gambit whilst in a headlock is a difficult skill to master!
I’m one of the world’s slowest walkers, so I don’t mind if women want to hike in their high heels as least it gives me a chance to keep up, plus my masculinity is partially retained. Then again I could wear the heels and I’d have an excuse for being slow?
So many things, but unfortunately I have to return to work. Great post and thanks for entertaining me 🙂
I’m glad you liked it! I knew that first one would be the selling point.
[…] I recently went on a search for hiking/outdoorsy blogs written by women.  I mean, I like men alot (its not a typo, click the link, dammit), but I was interested in reading more female oriented things, particularly things like women’s gear reviews.  So, amongst the many women-powered blogs I’ve recently added to my google reader was the blog at Gear Gals.  And on Thursday afternoon the google reader alerted me that there was a new post up.  And I said, “Why yes, I’d love to procrastinate right now and read this blog post.”  And I was not disappointed.  I am disappointed that my browser’s spellcheck STILL has to remind me how to spell ”disappointed.”  Anyway, I think guys and gals alike will enjoy Gear Gal’s recent post: “5 Reasons to Date Outdoorsy Women“. […]
Right on!
My fav line: “If you wake up late, delicately moaning that you’re tired and want to sleep in and don’t feel like going outside that day, you’re going to get left behind.”
Sooo true. 😉
I’m not the only one whose partner didn’t exactly expect that, then? 😉 Thanks for writing in!
I’ve never liked plastic when it comes to women. Dirt is perfectly fine for the woman in my life. Plus, helping each other clean off the dirt can be quite enjoyable, no?
Well that’s certainly an extra plus, isn’t it? Good point!
Wonderfully written, but you forgot one reason:
Very much down to earth and capable of looking after oneself.
Wish I could find one, but at my age (and generation) thats out fo question.
Oh, come on now, that can’t be true! Outdoorsy women come in all ages and walks of life. Don’t make me start a matchmaking service….
Agree with Jill, there are definitely outdoorsy women of all ages out there. I volunteer for an outdoor adventure group and lead hikes, most often of which are attended by more men (of all ages) than women. Your additional reason for wanting to date outdoorsy women is, I think, a very important one!
That is why I DON’T ever try to organize groups like that. I just KNOW it’s going to turn into a sausage fest and how do you prevent that? Limit the number of men?
Admittedly, that’s not a bad idea…
My climbing club’s basic mountaineering class actually does go for a 50:50 gender ratio (and we do have enough female applicants to make it work).
Great blog posting – so true! Still on the hunt for my authentic Outdoorsy girl. I’ve run into many poser outdoorsy girls. They act the part, but can’t walk the walk – and it becomes apparent pretty fast. I guess that is the sign of something good – when posers abound!
Quite an interesting perspective! There is no shortage in Alaska, by the way.
Ben, just keep looking! Is it a deal breaker for you that the girl be outdoorsy and able to hold her own in your favorite pursuits? Or is she just as attractive if she’s stronger or better than you at other things? Might just be that you want someone who challenges you. In any case, I’d guess there are additional criteria.
I’d also be curious to know what “posers” means to you…
Katie, a “poser” to me is when a woman says she’s interested in something because she thinks that you’ll like her more if she feigns interest. This will even be taken to the extreme where she will purchase the equipment and express interest in participating – but then always flake out.
This is not the same as her wanting to try the activity because she hasn’t done it much or likes to try new things.
For me, It’s a total turn-on when she has her own interests and excels at them, and is willing and patient to take me out and see if I like them too.
I’ll always keep a sharp eye out for the authentic.
Huh. This one throws me a bit.
That just seems like normal “I like you” behavior to me. Of course you try to get closer to people you’re attracted to by being interested in the same things they are interested in. I always thought it nice when a new guy tries out my sports even if he’s not as into them as I am.
I don’t see anything wrong with that, and of course a newbie isn’t going to be a rock star at this stuff right away. Of course, if I try out a new beau’s sport and he’s impatient and annoyed with me for not being good at it, I’d probably never go again either. Not that it’s necessarily what’s happening to you, Ben, but maybe?
What happens if she genuinely wants to try it but doesn’t like it? Is she then a “poser” for trying it even though she wasn’t that into it to begin with?
I need more info on this phenomenon…
Thanks for the clarification, Ben. It seems our definitions are a bit different, but similar. I understand Jill’s perspective; when you’re excited about being with someone, you want to try the activities they do. Hopefully, like you say, the other person’s willing to take them out and be patient. It’s also cool to be with someone who might not be into what you’re into, but is at least willing to come along once in a while.
It’s a completely different story if you’re inexperienced, but feign excitement and being experienced to attract a mate. To me, a “poser” is someone who feigns expertise or knowledge about a particular activity on purpose with the goal of effecting others’ perceptions. For example, someone who says, “I’m a backpacker,” but they’ve never done an overnight trip that required them to carry their sleeping gear. It’s someone who either doesn’t have the knowledge and experience they pretend to, or who thinks they’re more knowledgeable about a particular activity than they are.
But in my world, “posers” are people who need validation on a regular basis. The woman you’re describing is probably hoping you’re attracted to her because she’s hardcore and does the things you do. She might be afraid to admit her fears, lack of experience, etc. because she thinks you’ll judge her. She likely needs a good dose of positive reinforcement and some confidence. Either that, or she really hoped she’d like climbing/biking/mountaineering, but she just doesn’t and can’t figure out how to tell you.
You’re right, it’s a lot more attractive when people are sure of themselves, and can admit when they just don’t like to do something. It’s the same idea as pretending you love a band, food, anything really, that you don’t love in order to seem more attractive.
I think we’re all guilty of saying or doing things to make people like us more. We’re all concerned with how we’re perceived, and do things we think will make those perceptions what we want them to be. This reply isn’t advice as much as it is discourse, and I hope you’re able to find a woman who’s confident enough to show you who she really is.
Okay, I think we are getting closer to a similar definition. I would never call someone a poser that is geniunely trying an activity for the first time. Even if it’s just because someone they’re interested in likes it. I think that is perfectly normal behavior. Also, finding out you don’t enjoy an activity is a normal part of life, so I would never condemn someone for that.
When I use the term poser, I’m talking about girls who already know that they really don’t enjoy a given activity, but when asked by a potential love interest they claim that they do enjoy the acitivity. Furthermore, they’ll buy all the equipment and even “dress the part” of an REI Catalogue model – but again their intent is still not geniune. And this becomes apparent pretty quick. It goes much deeper than just pretending to know alot about a sport, but in actuality not. We are all guilty of that 🙂
Now, Katie does have a point in that we all do this to a certain extent with food, movies, bands, etc. But where outdoor activities involve a pretty serious amount of dedication, time and economic resources, they become a key part of your identity.
So, I’m not saying there are tons of faux-outdoorsy girls, but I’ve had experiences with my fair-share, and it just ends up making both people frustrated.
Ah, now I get it! Yes, that is frustrating and I think both men and women have been on the receiving end of that kind of stuff (otherwise known as “lies”).
It just cracked me up that you copped to faking it just a little. And yeah…I think we all do it! Well not me of course. I’m an expert on everything. heh heh heh.
Yep, I think we’re getting closer, and I definitely understand where you’re coming from a bit better. I still maintain that a girl might do this because she’s concerned you won’t like her if she doesn’t participate or like the activities…which might be true!
I wrote a whole blog post over at Adventure-Inspired about identity, and I’d venture to guess those of us who want a hardcore outdoorsy mate are looking for something deeper than that. Though we might want someone who climbs, hikes, backpacks, etc., we’re more looking for personality traits and characteristics. We’re looking for someone motivated, hardworking, independent, determined, and who makes a healthy lifestyle a priority.
Though, having someone to climb/hike/backpack with us is certainly a positive thing 🙂
Katie, I’d love to see a link to the blog! This is such a good topic. Its hard to really define and put into words why it is so important to have someone who gets after it in the outdoors and it is so true that these qualities really do represent deeper traits and values. I’d really like to get some more perspectives on this.
Robin – here’s a link to the post. let me know what you think!
http://www.adventure-inspired.com/2011/04/its-not-what-we-do-that-defines-us.html
I’m also curious to know what “poser” means to Ben.
On another note, I had no idea I married the New Renaisance Man Trifecta. All I knew was that I was annoyed that he was super good at those three things. I have to take him to foreign countries he doesn’t speak the language, just so I can beat him at something… 🙂
Wow Suz. Never had a lousy ex and evidently you married the holy grail of men. I’m not sure you should comment here anymore.
KIDDING! Kidding, of course. But, yes, I’m jealous.
This post is so true. I agree with the male friends thing. Before I met Jaymie I could never get a date because I’d always end up having dinner with the three dudes I went climbing with earlier that day. If a guy had come up and asked me for my number in that situation, I would have married him then and there.
I have yet to find anything that I’m better at than my husband, except maybe dancing and multi-tasking, but it’s not bad because he’s always teaching me a new skill. He’s the ultimate adventure partner!
I think it is one of the major reasons it’s hard for outdoorsy women to meet men and vice versa. The women are almost always out doing stuff with guys so they’re hard to approach. So maybe instead of looking for guys we should have been looking for ripper women instead; that way we get the best of both worlds.
I love finding out at age 37 that I’ve been doing it wrong all along…
Oh, you know what might be worse? When you finally do find yourself on a date with an eligible guy but you don’t figure it out until it’s too late because you’re so used to having activity partners who don’t have romantic potential. Either that, or you find yourself on a date when you didn’t want to be.
Sheesh, no one can win at this game.
I’m all about the outdoors women! They usually know what a good adventure REALLY is. Not just some dumb date going to the movies, the great outdoors beats ALL!
Word! Outdoorsy women rule.
Fun article! I’ll have to share it on facebook with my friends.
What about the next step? Marriage? Family? One thing that’s good about marrying an outdoorsy women is that you end up with an awesome outdoorsy family! Our daughters love the outdoors, are on the nordic ski team in their high school and were climbing 5.10s when they were 10 years old. From an early age, we took them everywhere and they traveled well.
[…] this post was insanely popular. It seems to have struck a chord with many readers. I’d write something […]
[…] an unintended consequence of listing all the great things about outdoorsy women in my last article was the contact from a bunch of guys who say they want to meet and woo a fantastic outdoors woman […]
The link to Chris Sharma? Made me spit coffee… Hilarious and true….
Heh heh! There’s no point in denying it.
[…] Launch or DemiseJill – Head Geargal on New Weather PatternMost Popular Posts Invisible Around Men Five Reasons To Date Outdoorsy Women Guide To Outdoor Dating In Appreciation of the Non-Dirtbag How To Meet Outdoorsy Women The […]